Editing for me was never a bad
word. However, because of my dyslexia it was beyond my abilities. For those of
you who might think I'm blowing smoke, I'll sight the short discussion Mr.
Raboy had with me after my English 101, Creative Writing class ended, and I heard
the "The Raboy Imperative," from this esteemed prof who'd taught me
to as he put it, "...include all the elements of a story in succession
such as the cow, pail, stool, milk bucket....and everything that led up to
drinking the milk!" Now my prof was trying to instill in me, my need to
spell and punctuate accurately. Our verbal exchange, I call it that
because we were sort of sparing, at least I was, was sort of hard on the ear. I
remember him saying, "You want to be a psychologist." Then trying to
suppress a laugh, he continued, "You can't even spell the word."
I had no
defense, so said nothing. Time stopped. I could almost hear the seconds tick
by. The tension was palatable. Finally, my friend, Ina who was standing next to
me, and was a great technician of all things grammatical cleared her throat.
Happy to shift our focus we both, at least in my mind's eye, turned towards
her, as she said, in her quiet way, "I'll be running Paula's office, so
don't worry about all of that." This was news to me especially since I was
certain, Ina's husband, a doctor himself, would have loved her to work for him
since that's what she'd been doing before they had children.
I was so
grateful that she rescued me from this onslaught of 'ought' that it never
occurred to me to find out if this issue had a medical name or if there was
anything I could do to overcome. Here I was learning how to help people do
exactly that. Yet, so used to the problem was I that it had become a
'Non-Issue' for me, sort of like being born a lefty, which I was, and then
taught to do everything with my right hand, which the school system did so well
that I'm profoundly right handed.
This was
my life, and as surly as Johnny Appleseed planted those apples, I believed I
was to blame for this issue. Ah! The Blame Game! Really? I did this to myself
for about a nanosecond. Then I remember Frank Sinatra singing "High
Hopes," and with a nod to the leader of 'The Rat Pack,' I decided to not
worry but hope! Hope is a good thing because without it 'the people perish.'
Yet hoping to become what I could not was a potential stumbling block.
Except....get this! God doesn't allow things to happen just because! He allows
things to happen so we can chose! It's in the choosing that we become. And it
is through changing, refining, or narrowing our choices that we know more about
our self and if we're walking with God, more about Him!
God
gifted us free will. It is in this freedom that we reveal our-self to our self.
Self-knowledge can be a powerful, heady experience...at least that's what I've
been told. I used to believe as Alfred Adler did that each of us has some flaw
that we're trying to overcome. Adler labeled this "The Inferiority
Complex." Therapists who use this paradigm site such notables as a 26 year
old deaf Beethoven to drive home this point. However, believing in Messiah, this is what I know
now, there is another way to look at obstacles. We read in the Apostle Paul's
second letter to the Corinthians 12:7, "Therefore, in order to keep me
from becoming conceited, I was given a thorn in my flesh..."
I
believe that each of us has at least one thorn in our flesh that 'none should
boast but all would give glory to God.'
Having
made peace with the 'thorn in my flesh' this dyslexia had no hold upon me. I
was free! Yet? But? Have you ever noticed that God always wants to impart more?
I have! Sometimes this 'more' is revealed to us quickly. Then again, we may
need to travel that long and winding road before we are ready to receive the
'more' God has in store for us. I say, "The more in store," because
Scripture says, in 1 Cor. 2:9, "...no eye has seen...no ear has
heard...no human mind has conceived' the things that God has prepared for those
who love him."
Paula, I enjoyed today's blog, and was impressed with how unaffected God's ability to use our lives is, in spite of what anyone else says or thinks. It also made me think of how profoundly our words affect people, even if they never say so, and how long those effects last, for good or for ill. And I agree with you that God has a specific purpose in many of the adversities we face in our lives. He not only allows them, but often ordains them for our good. God loved Paul too much to allow him to be ruined, and had too important a purpose for his life to allow Paul to become unusable because of pride. And so God, in His wisdom and in His mercy, gave Paul a thorn, and although it did not come gift wrapped, it may have been one of the best things anyone ever gave Paul in his life. Tough love. Great food for thought with this one, Paula! Thanks!
ReplyDeleteNeil,
ReplyDeleteVery time you post I'm blessed. Today was no exception for once again, I was incredibly blessed by your insight and comments!
Thank you, my friend.